Last Summer Swim Practice

Alex has now graduated from swimming just one on one with Miss Danielle to having a peer join him for his Fall Lessons. He did extremely well this evening, and is starting to enjoy figuring out how to keep himself floating in the deep water. He had a huge smile on his face as he was kicking around, didn't fuss when we put his floaties on his back, and gladly gave up his fun-noodle and attempted to float with just his back floaties. He also learned how to jump feet first into the deeper water, holding on to two hands, then he got really brave and learned how to jump holding just one hand. There was no fuss this time, absolutely none, when we changed from doing one thing to another, and he actually wanted to stay in the deep end even when Miss Danielle offered to let him over into what we called his "comfort zone".

Danielle and I had a great conversation about what we think would be best for him in the fall, and we both decided that a great idea is having him team up with a peer so they can learn things not only from Miss Danielle, but also from each other. She also believes that he will be ready, by the end of the next set of seven weeks, to test for being a Level 1 swimmer, because he has already got a lot of the basics that he needs down. For his age, she said she thinks he is doing fantastically, and I completely agree. Everyone, the lady in charge of Adapted Aquatics, the teachers, even the parents who have their children there too, say that they are so amazed that just seven weeks ago, this same little boy was screaming his head off because he didn't want to go in the water. Now if only we can get his Grandma to learn how much fun the water can be...

I would also like to thank him for being a wonderfully behaved little boy for Grandpa today. This morning, at 6 am, my father called me so I could come over and give him a shot with his Epi-Pen because he was stung by a bee while feeding his birds (crazy old bird man). When Alex got up, I sat him down and told him that his beloved best friend, Grandpa, was not feeling the best, and that he needed to be EXTRA good for him. He needed to be his nurse and NOT let him go outside. Alex did just that. Apparently when Grandpa did go outside, Alex got his shoes on and started going after him. But he was back inside by the time Alex got to the door. I could only imagine the butt chewing Alex would have done.

We still have some struggles, and I am reminded of them every once in a while. Like how he doesn't understand parties, and how he doesn't like having a lot of people around him. This past weekend at my niece's baptism was a prime example of him still having times that are not the easiest for him. However, those are becoming more and more of a rare thing, because I have learned how to better help him adjust, how to respond to him, and what good and bad situations are for him to be in. I don't write this blog to get pity from people, nor do I want to make other parents of autistic children feel bad if their child is more affected by it. I just want to use this as a tool for myself to talk me through things with Alex, and I also want it to be something that helps the people around Alex understand him better. Alex doesn't need people to treat him differently, but rather understand that what he sees and what he experiences is different than other children. Instead of just thinking he has some sort of discipline issue, this blog helps people to understand that when he lashes out it is the only way he knows how to communicate the fact that he is uncomfortable. He has words, but he doesn't have the ones he needs connected to certain things yet. But he will get there, I promise. Even Miss Danielle said this evening that she firmly believes that there is NOTHING that he can't do, if he just takes the time to learn it.

Countdown to School Continues

Sorry it has been a few days. Life has been happening.

Alex has done a marvelous job the last few swimming sessions that we have gone to. He can now kick his way across the pool without the floaties on his back, however we are trying to get him to calm down when he is in the deeper water so he can realize that he can float. This last time, Danielle was floating him on his back and managed to get him calmed down by singing to him. But when we put him in the deep water with his fun noodle, he still whines and expresses his want to go to the other, more shallow end of the pool. He knows he can touch with his feet there, and I think he thinks that means he can have more fun. However, once he realizes that he can swim and stay afloat in the deeper water if he just calms down, then I think teaching him how to swim will be much easier.

With the summer coming to a close rapidly, I am finding I am getting a little depressed about some of the things I wanted to accomplish with him but did not have the chance to. His pencil grip still needs work, because he doesn't hold it properly, and I think he would have an easier time writing if he did. However, being stubborn is definitely something he is good at (I know, he gets it from mom), and so he thinks his way is the best way. I think, though, that my key to beating that might be with his sidewalk chalk. Last week, Aunt "Bill", Thea Aspenson, my best friend, came over and we sat outside and drew on the sidewalk. He had a great time, as did we, and he liked showing her that he mastered the letter R. So I think the more dates we have like that, hopefully we can con him into holding the chalk our way, instead of his way.

I find that there are times where I wish he understood me. I wish that instead of freaking out, he would understand what I am saying and stay calm. Its hard to calm him down when he starts freaking out, and a lot of the time I am scared he will hurt himself. He is so much better around a lot of people, and since I haven't wanted to spend much time at home lately and have brought him with to a lot of different places, he has started to not want to be home much either. Sadly, many things stand in my way of having a place that is big enough for him to run around and exhaust himself from having fun. My dream of building my own house was brought up yesterday and even though it was not a part of the conversation, I was thinking about how much space I wanted for Alex just so he could have a lot of room to be comfortable. I want him to have a big bedroom with a lot of things he loves, like books and cars. But then I know that with that dream life, I will be taken away from him so that I can work a bunch to pay for it all. Although this dream house may be a few years away, I find that I now am faced with the delicate balance that many other parents are faced with: How to make enough money and still be there for your child.

Everyone deserves a place where they can relax, and un-stress themselves. What I thought was going to be a lazy summer has turned out to be quite different. But I have learned that I cannot show that to Alex, because he knows how mommy is feeling, and if I am having a bad day, so is he. I love, though, how he tries to make it better, by making funny faces and sticking his face in mine and smiling. He has a great heart.

Swimming, Boxer Troubles, and Kitties are NOT Supposed to Fly

A few things happened this afternoon that I feel the need to tell you all about. Hopefully some of you will laugh about it and be extremely happy for him like I have. Ok. Here we go:

First- Swimming lessons. He did an amazing job today. He was used to the water right away this time, and started to wander around the pool rather than just stay in his corner. We couldn't get him to calm down and try to float on his back, even after watching me do it. He kept freaking out like we were going to drop him. So then we decided to get his attention off of that for a bit and Danielle got him to splash with his feet, do some simple strokes with his hands, and then, she tricked him into floating around the pool with a fun noodle. She strapped some floaties on his back and put his arms over the fun noodle, then stranded him in the deep part of the pool. The only way he could get to where he wanted to go was to kick his feet and swim. He did magnificently. It was brilliant. And then when he got to a point where he could almost touch the bottom, she moved him back to the deep part of the pool and he had to do it all over again. The look on his face was marvelous. He was concentrating on where he wanted to go, and was kicking his legs like crazy. He was so enveloped in focus that when he got to the other side the last time, a smile burst across his face like he knew he did something amazing. We cheered him on, and he even cheered himself on by saying "I can do it! I can do it!". Danielle said she will do this with him again next week, so hopefully I will have some pictures to share.

Then, when we were on our way home, we stopped for his celebratory chicken nuggets and for some reason, he didn't want them. This was odd to me, but when I handed him his drink, he drank it all in less than a block. Apparently swimming makes the little man have massive thirst.

And finally, when we got home, he stripped out of his swimming trunks and went to put on his boxers (all by himself, because of course, he is practically a man now that he swam across the pool four or five times) and missed one of the leg holes. Now he is running around the house with both legs through one leg hole and the other leg hole is dangling behind him.

I know that not everyone can dwell in how cute my child is, but surely everyone can appreciate that he has definitely gotten his mom's silliness. For right now, however, I have to go, because Alex is trying to be like Tony and toss the cats around....